Sunday, March 25, 2012

Return

I haven't written in this blog in ages upon ages. Why? Not because I stopped working out. No, no, no. Actually, working out was my saving grace during the year that I've had. The reason I was away had nothing to do with backing off on my workouts but everything to do with death and dismay.

By November of 2010, my sister had discovered she had cervical cancer. I began taking her to appointments up in Cleveland - or trying to. There was such a pervading sense of gloom and imminent despair during that time. All my will to write was used up in my pursuit of my bachelor's degree. The stuff that I felt about my sister's suffering - and she was suffering terribly - was voiced and vented in other ways or held inside. We're coming up on the anniversary of her death. In fact, it has been almost exactly one year since the day I drove out to her house to bring her to the cancer center for the treatment she was avoiding...and never brought her home. She was admitted to ICU and then to a hospice house. She passed away on April 14, 2011. Right after her admission, my dad for whom I was caregiver, was hospitalized and in isolation with C. diff. He was able to see her one time before she died and then was too sick himself to understand. I told him he was not allowed to die. He came close, but did not. We could not have her funeral for nearly weeks while we waited for him to recover.

He was never "right" after his illness and Martha's death. Thanks to incompetency on the part of his medical team, he passed away on December 7, 2011. Just 9 days shy of his 86th birthday. I'm still trying to adjust to his absence.

There was life as well. On December 11, 2010 our dog, Sasha, gave birth to 9 puppies beside my bed. She wanted to have them IN my bed, but I refused the honor. After 3 weeks, Sasha decided the puppies were a pain in the neck and I was consumed with the care of all 8. I also worked tirelessly to find each and everyone a good home. Easier said than done! We kept one puppy, Charlie, who has turned out to be beautiful and well-behaved. But I must say that dealing with that many puppies is CRAZY - and with everything else going on, it was brutal.

During the midst of all this...I worked out. I taught my boot camp classes. I ran in 5ks. I did the Warrior Dash. I lift weights, was lazy about my yoga. The only thing that ever kept me from a scheduled workout was illness. Faith, sweat and family, those are the essential elements which kept me grounded.

This week I planning on writing about some of my favorite fitness finds of this past year.

As for today's workout - 72 killer minutes on my spinning bike. Wearing a heart rate monitor showed that I kept my heart rate between 80 - 88% after the warm up. I promised my puppy a jog...so until next time...

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